New Year, Same Determination

A long, long time ago, when I first discovered by love for romance novels and was struck with the desire to write my own, I went to Walden Books (yes, that's long ago it was) and picked up Writing Romance for Idiots. A close cousin of the popular dummies' books. This was before yahoo groups and social media. It wasn't before the internet, but definitely predated using the internet for absolutely everything, like we do now. Back then I wanted to write traditional historical romance novels, like the ones I read and loved. Which I still dream of writing, with a saucier twist than the ones I wrote back then. 

How to write romance for idiots gave lots of great advice. I haven't read the book in ages, but I'm sure much of it doesn't apply any longer. The industry has changed so much since then. But one of the tips I always remember was to go to a bookstore and see where you're books would fit on the shelves. The idea was to pick a pen name that would situate you near authors of similar genre, so you might attract a reader to pick up your book along with your fellow author's.

This is where my books would reside in my local Barnes and Noble

This advice isn't relevant to how readers discover books anymore, but it's still a habit to check out my sister authors every time I enter a bookstore. I love to see what other authors I would be surrounded by if I did get my book into their bookstores. Or what covers might border my books.

For the last few years, my life has been crazy. So much has been changing. My family, my location, my priorities. It would have been easy give up on my writing amidst all this upheaval. I'm almost ashamed to admit, I did consider it. Especially after being so long without finishing a book, and knowing how much work it will be to get back to where I was before. I had to really take stock if I still wanted this writing career anymore. Maybe I'd done what I wanted to do. I'd been published. I made a little money. I made some great friends. Maybe I should walk away with my good memories and be done.

But the more I thought about giving up, the more it became clear I couldn't do it. Not just because I still have so many characters and stories running around in my head (though that is true). But because there are so many goals I still want to accomplish. So many things I wanted to do and see and experience with my writing. I wanted to see my book on those shelves, sandwiched between such prized authors. I wanted to get the chance to write the historicals that drew me to romance in the first place. And paranormals. And dark romance. And maybe dystopian or fantasy. I wanted to see readers devouring the books I write. To know, even for a little while, I gave someone else happiness and joy with my words.

I couldn't walk away. I couldn't give up on myself and my dreams like that. My only option was to keep going, to keep pushing, no matter how hard. Even though I won't be able to devote the same time and energy that I used to. I'm still going to work towards these big goals. Because some dreams are worth fighting for. And this year I am determined to make them happen.

And I hope you do the same for yourself. Never give up. Never stop trying. If it's something you really want, keep fighting. Because I have no doubt if I keep pushing, keep working and keep dreaming, one day I will accomplish these big goals and make my dreams come true. And I'm sure you will too.

Tropes I’d Love to Write Someday

Over the last forty odd years of reading, I found that many authors tend to stick to the same tropes. For some it might be due to the type of stories they write or the genre they are in. It would be very difficult (though not impossible) for a contemporary romance author to write an arranged marriage story or for a fantasy author to write a single dad story. It’s just outside of the norms of their genre. Though I would gladly read both of these stories. For others, I believe they stick to the same tropes because that is just how their brains work. Those are the stories that they are drawn too.

I definitely see the same in my own writing. I often write the same tropes multiple times. My favorites being friends to lovers and second chance romances. Because I write spicier books, I’ve always found having that history between the characters helps me jump to the smutty stuff faster, instead of having to spend a lot of time having to create the relationship between them and the reason they are together. I love how the conflict and tension in these relationships that is there on page one. But even though I have a few tropes I tend to lean towards, as a lifelong romance reader and writer, I have a ton of tropes I’d like to write that I just haven’t found the right story for, or the right characters to entrance me.

Here are some the tropes I haven’t written yet, but I would like to explore one day soon...

Snowed In – This is one of my all time favorite tropes. As a lover of forced proximity romances, and someone who tends to set a lot of my stories in cold places, it’s amazing I haven’t written this trope already. And I have come up with a few ideas, but nothing that I think is worth of the trope.

Amnesia – this trope harkens back to my early early romance reading days, when this trope was a lot more prevalent, especially in the historical romance that were my first romance loves. One bonk on the head and any heroine could rewrite her entire life and find the prince (sometimes literally) of her dreams. Over the years this trope has gone out of favor, I imagine at least partially because of the unrealistic nature (though I always thought that was half the fun), but I’d love to write an amnesia story, maybe with a more modern twist. But as of yet, the story idea hasn’t come to me.

Professor and student – It’s still hard for me to believe I haven’t written a story about a student and professor yet. The first erotic romance, the one that had me enthralled and set me down this crazy career path, was a professor and student story. Nothing like that power dynamic to set all the butterflies loose in your stomach. Which is why I find it so hard to believe a story like this has come to me yet (though I did have a play version in Heart’s Ultimatium). I have no doubt one will. Hopefully very soon. 

Warring Families – as a lover of Romeo and Juliet in my teenage years this has always been a trope I’ve loved. Whether it is with vampire families, mafia families, or just two warring family restaurants, I always love two families that hate each other so much they can’t stand to be in the same room, and the children that fall in love to throw the whole thing on its head. I’d love to write my own version of the Hatfield’s and the McCoy’s, but maybe ones that fight over Christmas decorations instead of stolen farm animals. 

True Enemies to Lover – Enemies to Lovers is one of my favorite tropes. I absolutely love reading them. The tension between the characters. That white hot hate, that turns into white hot passion with just the right spark. When done well, it is amazing. But it has to be done well, and with the right characters, the right motivation and the right passion, otherwise you’ll never get that power and passion the reader—and I—crave. And as of yet, no characters that could hate each other that much have come to me. Though I am definitely on the lookout. There’s nothing I would like better than to write some hot hate sex scenes. The idea alone has me excited.

I’m sure there are a few others tropes I’d love to add to my collection, but these are the ones that really tempt me to bring them to life. And I hope I find the right story and the right characters to do soon. These tropes are all so awesome, how could you not want to write and read them all.

Are your favorite tropes included in this list? Do you have another trope you really love you want to see written? Leave it in the comments below and maybe I’ll add it to my list to torture myself with.

Sometimes It’s Okay to Be Comfortable

 There is a thought in modern self-help that you always need to force yourself out of your comfort zone in order to achieve your dreams. That no truly amazing feat can be accomplished without getting uncomfortable. And I have always prescribed to this idea. Especially when it comes to my writing. 

For the last few years, I have been trying to push myself to write the stories I want to write. To not limit my ideas by what I think I can write, or to stay within the safe borders of what has always been the romance genre. The self-publishing landscape has opened up so many different stories I would have never guessed would be so popular or amazing, and I see no reason the same couldn’t be true for the stories I want to tell.

And I think actively trying to ignore the negative voices in my head has been very good for me. And my writing. I have grown as an author. I’ve developed my voice even more acutely. And I have created some stories and characters I lover, that I never would have without pushing myself in this way. 

But there are some negatives to pushing yourself out of your comfort zone as well. The biggest being it takes work—hard work—to be so uncomfortable and stay determined. It can be downright grueling and very time consuming to keep going even when things are uncomfortable. And while I am getting close to completing some of these new stories, it is often hard to put in the time and dedication it takes to push yourself in these ways.

When Nanowrimo started this last year, I intended to continue pushing myself and my writing throughout the contest. To keep going with these harder stories, and maybe even get one a little closer to completion. But the words just would not come. I was having a really difficult time connecting to the stories and characters in such a pressurized timeframe.

Out of desperation towards the end of the month, I decided to take a stab at an older story I haven’t played with in years (one of my goals for Nanowrimo this year was to only work on stories I had already started, instead of adding even more started but not completed projects to my huge backlog). This story was light, fun, sexy, and very much like the stories I wrote at the beginning of my career. And surprisingly, the second I settled back in this world, the words just flew from my fingers. It was almost like magic. Before I knew it, I’d written over twenty thousand words in less than a week (numbers far bigger than I had done in years).

Maybe the speed at which I could write this story was because of all the work I’ve been doing over the last few years. Maybe it is because this story had been brewing in the back of my mind of so long, it was already formed and ready to come out. But whatever the reason, it felt great. Fun, and freeing and a little like coming home. It was a wonderful reminder that sometimes it’s okay to be comfortable. It’s okay to not push yourself all the time. Sometimes it’s okay to take that break, spend that day on the couch, reread that book you love and have read a dozen times instead of starting a new one, or working on that project that is comfortable and enjoyable.

And while I will be going back to my other stories, and continuing to push myself to try things with my writing I haven’t done before, it was nice to have a break. And remember the fun and the joy that my old comforts gave me. After all, writing might not always be easy, there is always enjoyment and excitement to be had in all stages of the process.

So if you are looking for permission to embrace the comfortable today, to relax a bit and not spend every moment pushing yourself to achieve that next lofty goal, you’ve got it. Those lofty ambitions will be there tomorrow. Take today for you.

Sex scene terms for romance books

I saw a post on a FB readers group about their pet peeves when it comes to how authors describe body parts in their sex scenes. Some hated 'her sex' and 'nub.' Others didn't like the 'c' word. I saw 'manhood' on this list, too. I avoid purple prose in my writing, but I like to be a little creative, and my word choices for this also depend on whether I'm writing a contemporary romance or a historical one. I never liked the word vagina. It sounds demeaning to me for some reason. Penis is okay but seems to be lacking something. Cock at least sounds strong. lol Medical terms are too clinical for my taste.

Whatever word choices you use, just be real as an author. You can't please every reader and they seem to be pickier than ever about what they read.

I'll leave you all with this: He dipped his banana into her cherry pie. Cheers!

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