A Break in the Routine #AmWriting #WritersLife #Summer #RestAndRecharge

 It’s July! I made it through a winter full of power outages and drudgery, and survived a spring season of house hunting and writing the last few chapters of Hawk’s Heart (Stranger Creatures book 5). Finishing that story really hurt my brain, until I finally, finally envisioned the ending, which felt just right. With a major project completed and the search for a house done, I’ve been sitting down at the computer, ready to plan my next writing projects and thinking about all the other things that need to be done, not to mention all the minutiae of house maintenance and cooking. The lists of things to do felt like an endless load of weight piling up in front of me, and I lost all energy and motivation.

Coffee and dark chocolate helped restore my energy and gave me some extra to store away, but the motivation to do any meaningful work or make any real choices? That stayed gone much like my short-lived love of waterfall cardigans and candy circus peanuts. Habits created by having to juggle a fair amount of hours at work while in college and then, the experience of raising children and everything that entails, has taught me that every minute must be used wisely or I will drown in a sea of tasks that require my attention. As the children have grown, I find myself still trying to do every single thing I think needs doing to keep the imaginary sea of entropy at bay. Summertime seems to be when I catch myself in this pattern of unnecessary overwork and overwhelm.

Maybe it’s the sunshine and lovely weather. Maybe the ocean is calling me through my seashell collection. Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s book Gift from the Sea was the inspiration for the sea shells that I have displayed in different places throughout my house. I intentionally left them out so they could become breadcrumbs that would lead me to remember to take some time for myself every now and then. Mostly, I just see the shells without really seeing them. Sometimes, though, could be the shells or the sunlight beckoning from the crack in my blinds, something snaps me out of my ultra-efficiency mode.

Whether it’s a staycation or traveling, or even short weekend trips, taking some time off always renews my desire to delegate every chore possible and to let the little things go for a while, maybe even completely. Habits are hard to break but the peace and the time for reflection regenerates a part of myself that I tend to neglect. With each reminder, I go further into the journey of finding what matters versus what is the kind of background noise that we, as humans, have been trained to fear and judge others about. Slightly messy houses, chipped manicures, simple, unglamorous dinners that don’t involve a ton of prep work and clean up, and souls that light up like flowers in the sun- that’s what summers are for. So, I’m taking a break and telling myself that it’s alright. This summer, I won’t get as much work done as far as actual words on paper, but the ideas are buried deep in the garden, growing into something better and brighter than they would have become if I had kept slogging through a constant routine of multitasking and mopping up messes.

 

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