You Are Not Alone

 

Image by Mira Cosic, Astrologer from Pixabay

You Are Not Alone

“When we want to write, sometimes the blank page stares back like a judgemental enemy or a white-washed wall. But what if the page isn’t blank to start with?” --Maria Berg

Writers at all levels may struggle with feeling stuck, lacking motivation, and battling self-doubt when faced with a blank page. People who feel pressure to meet external expectations or who suffer from imposter syndrome may find it difficult to overcome these barriers.

What would I know about this?

I am a hybrid author with a catalog of self-published works (fiction and poetry) and stories published in small press anthologies. I am a professional freelance editor. 

Since first grade, I have written poetry and stories. Throughout the years, I have primarily created for catharsis or my own enjoyment. My first attempt at professional publishing in 2007 was a terrible experience, and I quit writing. In 2012, I began writing again, assuming I would create nothing but fan fiction or poetry. When I became disabled, I decided to try publishing again.

My ADHD brain's constant chatter leads to prolific verbal output. In theory, this might indicate that I would excel at writing competitions such as NaNoWriMo, but that is not the case. I thrive when I work on multiple projects. Until I changed my strategy, every project I created for The Word-Based Writing Competition That Must Not Be Named was irredeemable crap. 

For the past several years, rather than trying to churn out one linear novel-length book by barfing out words to reach a specific numerical goal, I shove everything I write during the month into one horrible, never-to-be-published document that exists only for word count purposes. This yields severable viable projects at the end of November rather than one steaming pile of word salad. I do not intend to delve into the politics of the current NaNoWriMo situation. I'm simply using this well-known word count-based competition as an example.

Most writing advice is geared toward people with brains that function the "normal" way, not weirdos like me with heads full of squirrels and trauma. I've always been ashamed that my imagination spins out subplots like a spider on LSD rather than a spider that abstains from mind-altering substances. I'm working on not only accepting my spider on LSD synapses but also being proud of what they weave.

I rarely have difficulty coming up with ideas. My problem is developing ideas that aren't entirely out of control. I've also learned that being verbally prolific isn't the sole trait necessary for creating an enjoyable story. Even though I can work with words, I have blind spots. Since my audience is not in my head to get the inside scoop on my stories, they may find themselves lost. Another common criticism I receive is that my work is technically proficient but lacks emotion. The challenge comes in accepting such critique without taking it personally or interpreting it as "your writing stinks."

Those who were frequently shamed during childhood often struggle with criticism. ADHD remains misunderstood in modern times. It was never even discussed during my school years. I didn't even realize I had the condition until I was in my fifties.

Throughout my life, I have always assumed that I was wrong, stupid, and irreparably damaged. Teachers constantly admonished me to pay attention. At twelve years old, I was branded borderline retarded because of a low score on a pattern recognition test. I received this label despite possessing advanced reading comprehension and writing abilities. I find it difficult to accept criticism of something that, for me, is more than just a creative exercise. Without my stories, I would not be here preparing to celebrate my twentieth birthday for the third time.

I often turn to word and picture prompts to control my overflow of ideas. A blog called The Daily Spur offers a creative prompt every day, and I recommend it as an effective strategy against the blank page.

https://thedailyspur.wordpress.com/

In October, I learned that for me, too much planning leads to overcomplicating things, resulting in a story that is all outline, never to be written. Still, I'm not a pure pantser. I need a basic structure before diving into a story. 

A technique that works for one writer may not be appropriate for another. Stephen King is one of my favorite authors, but I would tear my hair out if I emulated his writing process. For one thing, I need a window to look out of, or I quickly start feeling like I'm being kept prisoner. 

Whatever does the trick to break free from writer's block is A-OK. It need not be what works for me. It does not have to be what works for Stephen King or your favorite author. Find what feels right and let it guide you to success.

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