Friday, August 31, 2018

Fight or Flight & Sexual Arousal

I think it is safe to say that everyone will have heard of the fight or flight reflex. But there is another aspect to this, which is sexual arousal.

There are various reasons why being scared can also trigger sexual attraction. 
First you must understand that even in this day and age we are still mostly driven by primal instincts from way back when. We aren’t aware of it, yet it does happen. Many of these instincts have to do with procreation, survival of the species, and you surviving potentially dangerous situations. 
In 2018 we don’t often end up in really dangerous situations, yet there are plenty of non-dangerous situations that trigger these deep primal instincts. And we all still have the fight or flight response.

When you get scared, massive amounts of stress hormones are dumped into your bloodstream, like adrenaline, dopamine, endorphins. These hormones will help you to either fight or run a few miles to get you to safety. There’s also reward hormones involved, dopamine and endorphins, to make you feel great for succeeding at your self-preservation. 
These pleasure hormones are one reason why you can get aroused when afraid, as the brain/body can get confused at making the distinction.
Another interesting fact is that strong sexual desire -which is not at all fight or flight of course- can trigger the same response stress response as a scary situation!
Again an indication that stress and sexual arousal seem closely related when it comes to how our body and mind reacts to it, however weird it may sound. 
Sometimes our bodies and brains allegedly simply get confused by what’s going on. It means your body can’t tell the difference between a state of arousal and a state of fear. 
This is the reason that people can feel frisky after watching a horror movie, and also why people can get excited by (the idea of) having sex in public. 
Don’t forget that people in general like to get a bit of a scare. Think of thousands of people who love horror movies, roller-coaster rides, or get addicted to the buzz of other scary activities.

There’s another reason that could be at play when it comes to fear and sexual attraction, which again has to do with survival, but in a totally different way. 
Just imagine living in the Stone Age and you were being threatened by someone. If you had no means of escaping, then you have another option that could mean surviving the ordeal: creating a bond with the one who’s a threat. Having sex can potentially form such a bond. Now remember, these are primal instincts, survival is the strongest instinct we have and when it comes to the crunch we will instinctively go to great length to get out of a situation alive and kicking.

Back to being a bit more lighthearted, because this fight or flight & sexual arousal response can also be fun to play with, provided of course that it is safe and consensual. 
Rebecca, the main character in my book Free Me, Master!, also gets herself in that situation with her Master, in her own garden at that. It was a scene that I enjoyed writing tremendously as there is no real threat, no real reason to be afraid, yet when someone ends up chasing us, even when in fun and by someone we love, this weird thing happens; our fight & flight response gets activated and we run! The combination of it being a person you love and find highly attractive triggers a sexual response as well. After all, we’ve just learned that our bodies don’t know the difference between fear and arousal, imagine what can happen if you combine the two, again in a safe, playful setting. Fireworks! 
If you’re desperate to find out how and what goes down between Rebecca and her Master, well, then you have to read the book! I do promise it is good. 
They talk about it afterwards as well, as Rebecca feels a bit awkward for having enjoyed it so much. Her Master explains her the ins and outs, and then they… well, read the book!
After writing this I’m now so into this scene I think I’m going to re-read it myself too!
Love ~ Dani Rose

My Website: Dani Rose Books

Free Me, Master! is available as E-book and paperback on:
Barnes & Noble
Totally Bound
And various others


Tina Donahue said...

Interesting concept. I never thought of it in quite that way. Congrats on your release. :)

Dani Rose said...

Hi Tina, yes, it is an interesting phenomenon, isn't it!
Love, Dani